Last night I lay in bed awake
for a long time. At times like that I tend to mull over my life and the. Last
night was one of those nights….
I went over the last 2 years
of my life and realised that I have been such a douche…. I had been asking for
independence and the ability to be my own person. Here I was berating over the
fact that I was again all locked up in a relationship again and was not my own
person anymore. Yet on closer inspection I have been my own worst enemy.
Here I
am in a perfect relationship and I could not even see it. I am with a man who
is quite happy to be the quiet one. He has no qualms with me finding my own
way, to be adventurous, to start new things. He is not standing my way at all,
he is actually my lighthouse that stands there quietly and shows me the way
when I lose it.
I have started my vegetable
garden, changed my hair colour, gone down to Cape Town, finished an online
counselling course and started my small online business and this gentle man has
just stood by and allowed me my space. Here I have been frustrated over my life
thinking that he is the one pulling me down yet I am the one that is pulling
myself down. Yes, I am financially stunted but that is not his fault but my
own.
So as the year of 2016 comes
to an end I have come to the realisation that 2017 can only be one of the best
years yet to come. As I prepare to enter the New Year with a new look on life
it can only be good. I am independent, I am free, I am capable of doing
whatever I put my mind to it. No more lamenting over the past spilt milk and
time to get rocking onto my life as the good Lord intended me to.
So, Goodbye 2016 you were a
good year…. Now it is time to say Hello to 2017 which I deem to be an even
greater one.
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